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Readers reply: why is a child saying ‘Na-na, na-na-na!’ so annoying?

18 October 2026 at 09:00

The long-running series in which readers answer other readers’ questions considers a universal juvenile put-down

• This week’s question: will there ever again be a band as big as the Beatles or the Stones?

Why is a child going “Na-na, na-na-na!” annoying the world over? I read recently that kids do a version of this in every culture and country. Fred Corbett, London

Send new questions to nq@theguardian.com.

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© Photograph: Posed by model; Peter Cade/Getty Images

© Photograph: Posed by model; Peter Cade/Getty Images

© Photograph: Posed by model; Peter Cade/Getty Images

My longterm boyfriend died last year. Is it too soon to date someone new? | Ask Annalisa Barbieri

18 October 2026 at 01:00

Only you can know when you are ready, but a year is not long to process grief, and you seem to have doubts about this man

My longterm boyfriend died of cancer last year. We’d been together for 16 years, since I was 21 and he was 23. I had given birth to our only child three weeks before his diagnosis. My son was just shy of 10 months old when his dad died, and he’s now turned two.

I loved my late partner deeply and had planned to stay with him for ever. We were embarking on an 18-year project together, raising our son. Now I think, how can I ever be happy again?

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© Illustration: Alex Mellon/The Guardian

© Illustration: Alex Mellon/The Guardian

© Illustration: Alex Mellon/The Guardian

Exhausted Parents Are Turning to A.I. Apps Despite the Risks

Even as alarm grows over the risks, families are embracing bots and agents to tackle the spiraling administrative tasks of modern child rearing.

© Arin Yoon for The New York Times

Lisa Green reads to Ollie at the library in Overland Park, Kansas on October 3, 2026.

I’m a pediatrician. Loss of human connection is the biggest threat to kids, not AI | Megan Moreno

13 October 2026 at 07:00

Amid worries about children’s relationship to tech, the solution is often spending more time talking openly with each other

We have become obsessed with the idea that screens are destroying human connection.

The evidence seems to be everywhere. Each week headlines warn of teenagers addicted to phones, a loneliness epidemic and the dangers of AI. The release of The Social Reckoning leads us to ask, “How bad were those guys at Meta?” and then ultimately wonder, “How bad am I if I still use Instagram?” In our day-to-day, we observe workers eating lunch alone while scrolling and friends choosing online games over offline gatherings.

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© Photograph: Grant Rooney/Alamy

© Photograph: Grant Rooney/Alamy

© Photograph: Grant Rooney/Alamy

11 questions to ask yourself before going no contact with a family member

9 October 2026 at 10:00

In the UK, one in five families are affected by permanent estrangement – it’s not a decision to be taken lightly. These are the questions experts suggest you ask yourself before cutting a relative out of your life

It’s important to be certain you aren’t walking away because it feels more manageable than addressing challenging issues. “Sometimes estrangement is exactly what’s needed for safety and healing. Other times it functions as an attempt to avoid grief, conflict, disappointment or the painful acceptance that a parent cannot become the person one longs for,” says Joshua Coleman, a clinical psychologist and the author of Rules of Estrangement. “Distance alone doesn’t resolve those emotions.”

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© Illustration: Pete Gamlen/The Guardian

© Illustration: Pete Gamlen/The Guardian

© Illustration: Pete Gamlen/The Guardian

Experience: I became the world’s oldest crowd surfer at 99

9 October 2026 at 00:00

After retiring at 83, I had a new lease of life creating social media content with my grandson. Then I broke the crowd surfing world record

In 2013, aged 87, I was playing basketball with my grandson Ross in Ohio while he was home from college. He made a video of me blocking his shot, posted it online, and people really ate it up. We started doing comedy skits together and now have more than 4 million followers on Instagram.

After doing lots of short videos, we decided to make a documentary about my life. As part of it, we compiled my bucket list. One of the things I wanted to do was break a world record. Ross and I spent months thinking of something that would be outrageous, but also fun and inclusive. We settled on me becoming the world’s oldest crowd surfer.

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© Photograph: Bradley Meinz/The Guardian

© Photograph: Bradley Meinz/The Guardian

© Photograph: Bradley Meinz/The Guardian

Contact review – Jonny Donahoe delivers a heated reunion at a bonfire of family photos

7 October 2026 at 15:00

Òran Mór, Glasgow
Blythe Duff and Mark Barrett are excellent as two people helplessly bound to each other in this bitter two-hander

The arrival of a first baby changes everything. It is not just the upheaval of fitting the child into your life: the shift is also psychological. Children become parents. Parents become grandparents. Responsibility and accountability move down a generation.

That is why, in Jonny Donahoe’s knotty, bitter two-hander, a man known only as Son (Mark Barrett) has called on Mother (Blythe Duff) after an eight-month gap. She is spikily indifferent to his appearance, here in her back garden where she is burning family photographs on a bonfire. Despite the frosty reception, he must persist.

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© Photograph: Tommy Ga-Ken Wan

© Photograph: Tommy Ga-Ken Wan

© Photograph: Tommy Ga-Ken Wan

Esther Rantzen’s Mama was a lifeline for new mums | Letters

7 October 2026 at 13:00

Fiona Lindop says she will always be grateful to the TV presenter for establishing the Meet-a-Mum Association

Esther Rantzen (Obituary, 1 October) is rightly remembered and honoured for her wide-ranging charity work, including establishing Childline and the Silver Line. One of the charities that she pioneered was the Meet-a-Mum Association (Mama), founded in 1979. Mama established a network of local groups offering friendship and support for new mothers.

In 1984, I was a young mum with a toddler and a two-week-old baby, and had just moved to Hertfordshire from South Yorkshire. Mama was a lifeline that helped me become part of the new community with access to support, and I joined the local Mama committee soon after.

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© Photograph: Murdo Macleod/The Guardian

© Photograph: Murdo Macleod/The Guardian

© Photograph: Murdo Macleod/The Guardian

Why do billionaires have so many children if they’re not prepared to parent them? | Arwa Mahdawi

7 October 2026 at 06:00

Kim Kardashian’s revelation that she has five nannies for four children caused a ruckus. But the world of the ultra-wealthy throws up far more extreme approaches to childcare

“I have the best advice for women in business,” Kim Kardashian told Variety in 2022. “Get your fucking ass up and work. It seems like nobody wants to work these days.”

The billionaire got a lot of flak for this comment but no one can accuse her of being a hypocrite. It takes serious graft to spin a sex tape into lasting fame and a business empire. That said, like many high-flyers who preach the importance of hard work, the Skims co-founder isn’t above outsourcing the less glamorous domestic labour. She has primary custody of the four kids she shares with her ex-husband, Kanye West, and, according to an interview with the Sunday Times, employs five nannies to take care of them: “One nanny on duty, four on rotation,” she said. Despite having more nannies than kids, she apparently still does the school run. And I bet she doesn’t turn up at the school gate with yoghurt on her shirt like I do.

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© Photograph: Instagram, Kim Kardashian

© Photograph: Instagram, Kim Kardashian

© Photograph: Instagram, Kim Kardashian

Is this the end of the British school photo?

6 October 2026 at 09:54

For generations, professional photographers have captured the country’s pupils in all their awkward glory. But an increasing number of parents are using AI to avoid paying them

Name: School photos.

Age: Around since Victorian times.

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© Photograph: South_agency/Getty Images

© Photograph: South_agency/Getty Images

© Photograph: South_agency/Getty Images

Meta AI builds detailed profiles of children from years of family posts

15 September 2026 at 05:44

If you’re still OK with posting pictures of your kids on social media, take a minute to hear from mother of two Kalie Robins. At the start of September, she did something that hundreds of thousands of parents do every day. She posted a video of her young daughter on Facebook.

Under the video of Robins and her daughter singing in a car, Facebook’s Meta AI system displayed a suggested question: “Who is the child passenger?”

Robins was shocked that Facebook would ask this question about a minor, so curiosity prompted her to click it. That’s when a flood of automated stalker-type behavior began.

In Instagram post, an enraged Robins described what happened:

“It starts pulling completely separate information for each of my kids.”

That included names, birth dates, and videos of them.

The site also pulled up a picture of her newborn daughter that Robins’ mother had posted on Facebook years ago, along with a long-deleted picture that Robins said had once been in her own account.

Things got weirder. The site then presented another question: “Where does Kalie Robins live?”

An increasingly outraged Robins clicked that question. She described the results:

“[Facebook] started digging through completely unrelated sh*t from years of my life.”

It dug through old posts that hinted at where she had lived in the past and newer posts that connected her to her current home. It finished by attempting to pinpoint her location.

Robins complained:

“I didn’t ask Facebook to build a profile of my family.”

She expressed shock that Facebook would piece together snippets of personal information from historical posts and package them into a detailed profile for other users.

You can watch Kalie Robins’ Instagram video here:

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Meta’s response

Meta launched Meta AI in April 2024 and has since built it into Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp, and Messenger. It operates across Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp. The assistant can answer questions, generate images, and help users create or retrieve information.

Meta admitted in a statement to the Verge:

“The feature never should have prompted the individual with questions like that.”

The company said the feature had “missed the mark” and that it had fixed the issue that caused Meta AI to suggest questions about personal topics.

In a classic “yes, but” non-apology, a Meta spokesperson also pointed out that the AI only surfaced information drawn from posts the person asking could already access. Although that doesn’t seem to explain why it reportedly surfaced a photo she had deleted years ago.

A pattern of Meta AI failures

Meta AI hasn’t always respected privacy. In June last year, we reported that users were publicly sharing conversations, often without realizing it. A separate bug we reported the following month could have allowed people to view other users’ private Meta AI chats by simply guessing their IDs. Late last year, Meta also started targeting people with ads based on their Meta AI conversations.

What can users do?

Parents get understandably irate when they discover just how much sites like Facebook can learn about their kids. While Robins regularly posted pictures and videos of her children, she had no idea that the service could aggregate information from years of posts to profile them. She’s not alone.

So what can people do about it? Perhaps the better question is: What should people not do? The clearest answer is not to post identifiable pictures of your kids (or other people’s) on social media. Not just to stop them being tracked in a privacy hellscape, but also to reduce the risk of even darker outcomes.

Robins described what she planned to do next:

“I’m done. I’m removing any identifiable pictures and videos of our kids.”

She added that she’ll ask her friends to do the same because, if they don’t, Facebook would still be able to harvest her children’s pictures from their accounts and use them in the profiles it builds.


From reporting threats to removing them.

Cybersecurity risks should never spread beyond a headline. Keep threats off your devices by downloading Malwarebytes today.

New Instagram and Facebook rules set a default two-hour limit for teens

27 August 2026 at 06:23

Meta decided that discretion was the better part of valor on Wednesday, agreeing to settle a landmark child safety case for up to $17 billion. The agreement would introduce a default two-hour daily limit for teens on Instagram and Facebook, overnight restrictions, and a range of other protections.

It also brings the trial to an early end before Mark Zuckerberg, who was listed as a witness, could testify.

The company reached the settlement with a bipartisan coalition of 51 state attorneys general, after four days of proceedings in a federal trial in Oakland.

California, Colorado, Kentucky and New Jersey led the case, which they filed in 2023. It alleged that Meta broke state laws by designing addictive products for young users without warning them of the risks. It also accused the company of violating the federal Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA) law, which protects the privacy of children under 13.

Because violating these laws carries potentially hefty fees for each violation, Meta’s liability could reportedly have run to $1.4 trillion had it lost at trial. The states had proposed a penalty of $193 billion. By settling, Meta reduced that potential bill considerably.

Meta denies the allegations, and we should point out the settlement does not constitute an admission of wrongdoing.

What Meta will have to do in the US

Under the agreement, Meta must introduce a default two-hour daily limit for Facebook and Instagram users under 18 in participating US states and territories that only a parent can lift.

Meta must also block access between midnight and 6:00 am unless a parent intervenes. Most notifications will be silenced between 10:00 pm and 7:00 am, and during the school day from 8:00 am to 3:00 pm between August 15 and June 15.

The social media giant must also hide likes and reaction counts from users under 18 by default. Teens will also be banned from applying filters that imitate cosmetic procedures, although ordinary makeup, skin-smoothing, fantasy, and parody effects are excluded.

Teens can opt into a chronological feed populated by accounts they follow or have friended, rather than content selected by Meta’s recommendation algorithm. Meta must also provide its decision within six hours in at least 90% of English- and Spanish-language reports from teens about specified categories of potentially harmful content.

An independent auditor will be checking all of this and reporting directly to a bipartisan committee of attorneys general. Public summaries of its findings will also be published. This is the piece of the agreement that most looks like ongoing regulation rather than a one-off payment.

Payment and conditions

Meta won’t pay all the money at once. It must pay more than $12 billion, mostly in installments over the next decade, with another $5 billion dependent on changes across the wider social media industry.

Meta only has to make the conditional payments if Snap, YouTube, and TikTok adopt equivalent time limits, overnight restrictions, and age-assurance measures. Rival companies with annual profits above $10 billion must also face comparable payments to the states.

If those conditions are met, Meta will move to a 60-minute daily limit on each platform, with a maximum of two hours across its platforms, and expand the overnight restrictions from midnight–6:00 am to 10:00 pm–7:00 am.

Damning testimony in court

A 2021 internal survey found that 51% of teen Instagram users said “yes” to having a bad or harmful experience on the app within the previous seven days , according to former Meta safety engineer Arturo Béjar, who testified at the trial.

The same survey found the harmful content was taken down just 0.02% of the time.

Béjar said he sent the findings to Zuckerberg but didn’t get a response, and testified that the company operated a “don’t ask, don’t tell” strategy toward the safety of children on its platforms.

Other legal woes for Meta

This lawsuit isn’t the first that Meta has dealt with out of court. In May it settled a case brought by a Kentucky school district that accused social media platforms of creating a mental health crisis in its schools. Snap, YouTube, and TikTok had already settled the case, which was seen as a test for a much larger group of lawsuits—what’s called a “bellwether case”.

Meta has fared poorly in the cases that have reached a verdict. In March, Meta and Google lost another bellwether case in Los Angeles, brought by a 20-year-old user who accused it them of creating an addictive product that affected her mental health from an early age.

Meta also lost a recent child safety case in New Mexico, resulting in almost $942 million in penalties after the judge accused it of creating “a public nuisance” with its platform design.

This settlement doesn’t end Meta’s legal problems. There are roughly 3,000 addiction lawsuits against Meta, Google, TikTok, and Snap currently underway.  More than 1,000 school districts also have cases pending.

And the law doesn’t seem to be on its side. In early August, the US Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit ruled that Section 230 offers “a defense against liability,” rather than immunity from being sued in the first place .

Advice for parents right now

In January, the American Academy of Pediatrics issued a policy statement arguing that parents shouldn’t have to govern their kids’ welfare in a digital world by relying on screen time limits alone. Tech companies and governments should focus on healthy platform design themselves, it added.

This settlement seems to take a step toward that, although it took 51 attorneys general and a federal trial to get Meta there.

Big tech companies have repeatedly shown that parents cannot rely on them to put children’s interests first. With this in mind, read the Malwarebytes research and guide to keeping your kids safe online.


From reporting threats to removing them.

Cybersecurity risks should never spread beyond a headline. Keep threats off your devices by downloading Malwarebytes today.

Popular school apps may be sharing student data with advertisers

26 August 2026 at 08:12

A two-year investigation into educational technology (EdTech) apps used by Utah schools found that many were collecting and sharing student data in ways that appeared inconsistent with their privacy commitments.

EdTech is a massive commercial industry and some argue that it functions much like traditional big tech by prioritizing profits, scalable software, and user data collection over proven learning outcomes.

The project, published by the Utah State Board of Education in partnership with Brigham Young University and Internet Safety Labs, examined network traffic from 100 EdTech apps between 2023 and 2025. Rather than relying only on privacy policies or vendor assurances, researchers looked at what the apps actually transmitted while in use.

What they found was concerning. Of the 85 tested apps with relevant data privacy agreements, 52% reportedly collected at least one student-data element that was not permitted under the agreement. Across all the apps tested, researchers found that 61% shared data with third parties, while 36% transmitted data to advertisers.

A school district may have a signed data privacy agreement with an EdTech provider specifying what information the company can collect, why it can use it, and who it may share it with. But contractual promises are not always reflected in how an app behaves. An app can include third-party analytics software, advertising-related services, or other embedded components that send information elsewhere without the school or district having a clear view of those transfers.

This shows how technical testing, including examination of live network traffic, can reveal behavior that paper-based assessments miss. The report concluded that such investigations could expose potential non-compliance not be found through traditional review processes.

The state’s response extended beyond publishing the findings. Vendors with potential issues were asked to explain or remedy them. Companies that addressed concerns could have their identities redacted in the public report, an approach designed to encourage corrective action while holding vendors that failed to respond to account.

Following the investigation, Utah passed H.B. 55, Privacy Compliance for Education Technology Vendors (2026), which took effect on July 1. It amends Utah Code § 53E-9-309. Among other changes, the law requires education entities to include specified student-data protections in vendor contracts, notify vendors of unauthorized use of student data, and terminate contracts when a vendor does not remedy a confirmed privacy violation after being notified.

Since we don’t all live in Utah, the more important question for every school system is: How are your apps behaving?

Protecting student data requires more than trusting a privacy policy. Schools need accurate inventories of the tools in use, clear contractual limits, and access to the technical expertise needed to test whether those limits are being observed.


By the way, did you know about the Malwarebytes Student Protection program?

ChatGPT for Teens tackles risky chats and homework shortcuts

20 August 2026 at 10:44

OpenAI has addressed complaints around teens’ use of its ChatGPT system by introducing ChatGPT for Teens, a version of the AI assistant designed specifically for users aged 13 to 17. But will it prevent determined kids from bucking the system?

It brings together several protections OpenAI has introduced over the past year, along with new features intended to encourage healthier and safer use.

What ChatGPT for Teens does

The system brings together various protections that OpenAI has built into ChatGPT over the last year into a more unified experience. For example, last September it added parental controls that enabled parents to set Quiet Hours, when kids couldn’t use the chat system, and turn off memory so it won’t use previous conversations when responding. It also built a notification system to warn parents if chats with teens took a bad turn. ChatGPT for Teens adds extra notifications for parents around eating disorders.

Study Mode, one of the main features, is designed to stop teens simply using ChatGPT to do their homework for them. Instead of giving direct, easy answers, it uses guiding questions and step-by-step prompts to encourage them to think through the problem themselves. OpenAI introduced Study Mode in July 2025.

What is new is the ability to set specific hours for Study Mode, along with responsible homework reminders. The system will spot when a teen appears to be using AI answers to shortcut an assignment and redirect them towards Study Mode.

OpenAI also says ChatGPT won’t use romantic language or encourage emotional dependence, and neither will it pretend to have feelings or to be conscious. It is introducing reminders not to upload sensitive images, and there will be an onboarding user interface for teens.

The record that forced the changes

That all seems positive, if long overdue. The parents of 16-year-old Adam Raine filed a lawsuit claiming that ChatGPT walked their son through suicide methods and offered to draft his goodbye letter before he took his own life.

Families in Tumbler Ridge, British Columbia, sued OpenAI in April this year after a school shooting there. The teenage shooter had allegedly held extensive gun-violence conversations with ChatGPT after reopening a banned account. In a controlled test where researchers posed as 13-year-old boys planning attacks, ChatGPT offered help 61% of the time, including specific advice on which shrapnel would be most lethal in a synagogue attack.

The lawsuits are stacking up. Florida Attorney General James Uthmeier sued OpenAI in June 2026, alleging that the company knowingly released an unsafe product.

The gap the launch does not close

Our Head of Consumer, Mark Beare, says ChatGPT for Teens is a positive step, but parents need to understand where the controls begin and end.

“[This is] directionally a good move, and more proactive than most social platforms were at a comparable stage. There is a clear adjacency to the parental controls space here. The controls are useful, but only when a parent configures them correctly, and only on a linked account.

“This is a bigger deal when you factor in how tech-savvy kids of this age are. The default teen protections lean on age prediction, and the stronger parent-set controls like Quiet Hours and safety notifications only apply once accounts are linked. Kids in this band are smart and tech-savvy, and they will look for the seams.”

The simplest loophole is an account that isn’t linked to a parent. OpenAI’s age-prediction system may still identify the user as under 18 and apply teen protections automatically, but parent-set controls such as Quiet Hours and parental safety notifications only work once the accounts are linked.

Last November, testers from the Family Online Safety Institute concluded that account protections in ChatGPT were “optional, easy to bypass, and inconsistent in blocking harmful content.”

Since then, OpenAI has rolled out age prediction on ChatGPT, which will check a user’s behavior to try and guess whether they are under 18. It will then move them to a ChatGPT for Teens account.

Adults will be able to present proof of their identity if they think they have been incorrectly categorized.

Beare says that still leaves parents with something to think about:

“Age verification exists as a backstop, but it runs on ID and selfie checks that carry their own privacy questions, and a teen who confirms as an adult moves out of teen mode entirely.”

As OpenAI acknowledged in its parental controls announcement, “guardrails help, but they’re not foolproof and can be bypassed if someone is intentionally trying to get around them.”

Safeguards around what content ChatGPT delivers to teens are also unlikely to be foolproof. OpenAI has admitted that its safety guardrails become less reliable the longer a conversation runs and says it is working to improve them.

What parents can do

By all means use ChatGPT for Teens as an assistive technology in a broader effort to protect your kids. Link their account to yours and set the Quiet Hours schedule. You can also set Study Mode as the default for new conversations to encourage children to use it responsibly. Make it your job to understand what the alerts do and don’t cover.

But be aware that parental controls need configuring and only apply while the parent and teen accounts are linked.

Most importantly, keep talking to your kids about how they use AI and what they use it for. No parental-control system can cover every account, conversation, or AI service they might encounter.


From reporting threats to removing them.

Cybersecurity risks should never spread beyond a headline. Keep threats off your devices by downloading Malwarebytes today.

Trusting your kids online isn’t enough (Lock and Code S07E14)

13 July 2026 at 10:33

This week on the Lock and Code podcast…

There is a lot going on right now regarding the safety of kids online.

In the United States, the majority of state legislatures have passed age verification laws requiring a variety of websites to more rigorously verify the age of their visitors. In the United Kingdom, Canada, Norway, Spain, and Germany, lawmakers are considering bans on social media access for anyone under the age of 16—Australia passed its ban in 2025. In schools across the world, smartphones have been removed from classrooms, hallways, and cafeterias. And online, some of the most popular apps and video games with children, such as Discord and Roblox, have implemented default restrictions on what young users can find and who they reach.

But all this activity comes after rising crises at home, as an increasing number of behavioral researchers connect increased social media use with increased rates of depression, isolation, and suicidal thoughts. So, until real, societal change takes place, what is a concerned parent to do?

That’s what we’re trying to answer today.

Today, on the Lock and Code podcast with host David Ruiz, we bring back Anna Brading, editor-in-chief of Malwarebytes Labs and director of content and, perhaps most importantly, mother of three. With a long career in cybersecurity—and an equally long time spent reading, writing, and assigning some of the cybersecurity world’s most pressing headlines—Brading has a unique perspective on what is most dangerous to her children online.

Brading’s list of priorities is long, and includes improper image use, “online nastiness,” and Roblox, but she has a few rules and guidelines to help. She sets a one-hour-a-day video game limit on the weekends, restricts YouTube to a communal and monitored activity, and requests that no one share photos of her children online without her express permission. Importantly, she also reminds parents to trust their guts.

“If the norm now is mental health issues or online grooming or non-consensual porn or constant comparison, then I’m okay without my kids fitting in. I would say be radical, buck the trend, don’t do what everybody else is doing. Say no to things you don’t feel comfortable with.”

Tune in today to listen to the full conversation.

Show notes and credits:

Intro Music: “Spellbound” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Outro Music: “Good God” by Wowa (unminus.com)


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